Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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