Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
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