I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
We left an ass print on the piano.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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