I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
