Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
