Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
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All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
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He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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