Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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