You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
