"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
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I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
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He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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