Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
