Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
