Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize