I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
