with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I haven't been this sober since birth.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
