I like my sex mixed with concussions.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
