He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize