so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
