hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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