Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
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3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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