lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
I'm at about main and main street
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Randomize
