eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize