I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
