he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
