If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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