I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
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