Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
All I want is dick and wine.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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