literally had 100 drinks last night.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize