I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
