it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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