im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Randomize
