I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Randomize
