Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
