so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
