Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
