Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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