are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
