is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
