3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize