i jhust puked up my retainher.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
he was CRYING into my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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