at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
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