This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Of course I have a pirate flag
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize