i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
