:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
