just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
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Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
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Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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