yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.