its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
