two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
