Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize