Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
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