He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
